“Beholder”

by Sarah Grey

The girl behind the counter is a waif with mottled cheeks, swaddled in a blue barista’s apron.  Her nametag, scratched half-bare, tells me only that she is a trainee.  She offers me a timid smile, thin sparkle-glossed lips closed tight.  She wears augmentation lenses, red plastic frames that glitter, a cheap pair that clash with her yellow blouse and leave her looking like a deflated circus tent.  Through them, she squints at me, perhaps seeking common ground, but more likely gauging the level of customer service I’ll expect.

She can’t read my traits, though.  I am a private person; I do not relish the nagging chime of new comments added to my cloud.  I pay a generous sum to a restriction service each month.  In return, my data is viciously guarded, bolted and buried like sacred gold.  Beyond my physical appearance, all this girl can know is that my name is Maria, that I am fifty-six, that I am an equity partner in a local law firm.  She will also see a blink to my charity, founded and named in my daughter’s memory.

My own lenses are Italian—brushed platinum frames with comfort-molded earbuds and a soft rose tint that cools the cafe’s bright fluorescent lights.  I blink visuals on, hoping to learn the girl’s name, and an avalanche of words and images engulfs her.

Murmurs of impatience grow from the line behind me as I stand, wordless, struggling to absorb it all.  Her name, in pink glittering script, is Hannah.  She is a Cancer, she is sixteen, she has a dog named Christo.  She saw a romantic comedy at the multiplex downtown last night and rated it four of five stars.  Her latest blog post consists of clumsy poetry and dim lense-snapped photos of wilting trees.  She has revealed every soft cranny of her being, her heart and hopes and passing minutes of her day, like a flock of bleeding prey laid bare to the world’s sharpened teeth.

But Hannah herself, pets and poems and star charts, is a mere wisp behind by her trait cloud.  It swarms with the judgment of her peers, settles on the seams of her blouse, gnaws at her round cheeks.  Some call her shy, quiet, withdrawn.  Most have agreed, in ragged fonts and misspellings, that she is ugly, stupid, disgusting.  The consensus is that she is weird, and the word hovers like an imperious hive queen above her.

She is underage; her parents could shield her from this cruelty.  Perhaps they are too absorbed in responsibilities, in vital imperatives, and have forgotten, momentarily, that they have a child.  Perhaps she has succumbed to pressure-cooked youth and begged them not to interfere.  Either way, old cracks in my heart open wide.

I blink visuals off and her cloud vanishes.  Without it, she is just a girl, her lank hair framing a forced smile on a face paralyzed by hurt.

The line behind me hums, impatient.  I offer her my warmest tone.  “Large coffee, please.  Cream, no sugar.”

She nods, silent, and reaches for a cup high atop a stack to her left.  It sticks; she yanks with both hands.  The tower leans, slows, and finally collapses.  Cups shower the tile floor, bouncing toward polished tables and the feet of waiting customers.  The hum swells to an irritated grumble.

A wiry man in a pressed shirt with rolled cuffs races out from behind cappuccino machines and boxes.  His eyes are narrow and his jaw is clenched.  “Hannah, come here immediately,” he says.

Hannah’s lips tremble.  She follows him.

In moments I have my coffee, steaming and fresh and free of charge, with a shining gift card for a free sandwich.  “To compensate for your inconvenience,” the wiry man says.  His lenses have polished silver rims.  I blink on visuals and learn that he’s Martin, age twenty-seven.  His peers deem him thorough and efficient.  I can blink a review of his performance, if I’d like.

I don’t.  Instead, I thank him and leave.

Outside, the sky is dank and chill.  Hannah sits on a curb, nose red, eyes flooded beneath plastic lenses, green crocheted sweater pulled tight over her yellow blouse.  Her apron is gone.  She sees me step onto the sidewalk, flinches, and stands to leave.  A new word, a jagged bite of faceless corporate font, has settled on the fringes of her cloud: incompetent.

She hurries up the street, away from me, adjectives trailing.

I blink up comments and whisper a word beneath my breath.  It is one I have wished, so many times over so many cold years, that I had spoken to my little girl, when she was Hannah’s age, when hearing it might have saved her life.  I blink my choice of fonts, and send it away.

I pay a premium for designer lenses.  My comment data flies fast and anonymous.  She will hear the chime in a space of heartbeat, but she will never know its source.

Hannah stops short beneath a wilting oak tree at the corner.  She scans the intersection, squinting at tinted windshields and shop windows.  She turns my way, but her eyes move past me, seeking a more likely source.  Her expression is vexed, but her tears have stopped.

Several long moments pass before she gives up.  As she to continue up the block, a smile peeks from the corners of her mouth, and she holds her chin a little higher.

Her cloud follows her, a long trail of patchworked fonts.  At the tail is a single word, tiny but present, in shimmering pink script that matches her name: beautiful.


 Sarah Grey is a mother, an attorney, an art historian, a medievalist, an aggressive advocate for the disabled, a militant vegetarian with an unshakeable passion for cheese, and, of course, a writer. She lives with her family in Arizona, but will always be a Californian at heart.

Copyright © 2013, Sarah Grey. All Rights Reserved.

45 comments
Lantis
Lantis

Beautiful. Thanks for writing.

John P
John P

The tech is believable, in our world of social media and Google Glass. The setting, what we see of it, equally so. And the story... the story itself is beautiful. A lot of flash fiction leaves me unsatisfied, but this story is perfect, the ending just right.

Alisha Chhabra
Alisha Chhabra

tryng to read n interpret...my first step on the threshold of this luxurious domain......appearing for a competition very shortly........bless me...

Flash Fiction Online
Flash Fiction Online

My apologies. It should read "The Social Phobic's Guide to Interior Design". Either way, swing on over to the site and check it out while you're reading "Beholder".

Sandra Bell Kirchman
Sandra Bell Kirchman

With the passing of Elmore Leonard last month, the importance of using the exact words to get the idea across has become so important to me. This story, under 1000 words, had me under its spell from the first word to the last. What a shining example of capturing the reader's heart without drowning him/her!

Chelsea Cooper
Chelsea Cooper

Wow, really interesting. I love the tech and ideas. Sweet ending.

Brett Hoppough
Brett Hoppough

A very smooth read with a fantastic message. I'm a severely anxious person in public; so, I can relate to this.

Smedley
Smedley

What a beautiful story.

Big Joe Cooty
Big Joe Cooty

Well done again, Sarah Grey. I have read two of your stories and loved them both. I am a Californian who is moving to AZ asap. I am a militant agnostic (I don't know and you don't either!) but will eat anything that holds still long enough.

georgianeighbor
georgianeighbor

I love this story of empathy and love and opportunity.

Kim Kincher
Kim Kincher

A picture of the pros and cons of our over automated techy, social media based society. Thank you.

mjrafferty
mjrafferty

Well done! As a writer myself, I really appreciate the mixture of sci-fi an literary. Lots of fun to read and conjure.

Laura Elizabeth
Laura Elizabeth

Really enjoyed reading this. I could picture it all beautifully in my mind's eye. The hum of the cloud that follows people around will stick with me all day.

Michael Robertson
Michael Robertson

I love this. In a world full of trolls, compassion can still trump them all.

Mark Pearce
Mark Pearce

I liked this. Well written and a novel idea.

Jeff Ellis
Jeff Ellis

Wonderful story, Sarah. Excellent message with a really masterful word economy. Well done!

lorriann16
lorriann16

I absolutely love this story. I'm a little teary at the end!

invisiblestrength
invisiblestrength

Absolutely ravishing. Original, touching- complete. Thank you for publishing this.

audrey
audrey

great story, good for working on in school with teenagers.thanks for making it available

Lou Sytsma
Lou Sytsma

Lovely story indeed. Touching without being saccahrine. As noted loved how you show how human connections trump technology. Congrats!

Anna Ilona Mussmann
Anna Ilona Mussmann

Thanks for this! Amidst all the technology, you show that still the human choice to show compassion remains.

Guest
Guest

Thank you for this! Amidst all the technology, still the choice remains to show compassion and humanity.

Flash Fiction Fan
Flash Fiction Fan

All too often the imagined worlds of fiction writers, especially with sci-fi writers, are ones I feel I am only reading about, not really experiencing, but not with this story. What a rare pleasure - to be drawn, by the power of words, into the world you created, able to share the experience of being there with the characters who inhabit it. Thank you!

Carlie
Carlie

Oh, that was good! Well done Sarah. Have you a site I could follow you on? Would love to read more of your work.

Jeff Ellis
Jeff Ellis

An excellent execution of a really great commentary on today's social media and its affect on society. I really loved this and the message it promotes.

Udicious
Udicious

Bravo! Loved the way it was written, the implications it made and how in the end, you treasure the oft unheard kind word in all its glory.

Roger
Roger

Seriously awesome. Incredibly inspired piece.

Darrin
Darrin

Awesome idea and nice touch.

John Rochester
John Rochester

A whisper of encouragement spoke through the spirit-- nice!It always amazes me how some writers can write such awesome stories with so few words...

Annecdotist
Annecdotist

This story really spoke to my current experience as a woman of around Maria's age just starting blogging but unsure how far to take it and anxious about getting all the negatives like Hannah. So thanks Sarah for a great read and do come and visit my blog if you have the time.

Al
Al

I read this for a requirement in class, it gave me chills. I read this over 4 times, It's incredible how much she got across in 2 pages! I was blown away, I wish this was longer!

Greg Bryant
Greg Bryant

Beautiful characterization in such a short piece -- both of the narrator and of Hannah.

Alex
Alex

This timeless theme of giving without expecting anything in return bodes well in the futuristic setting, emphasising the power and importance of generosity, however small.

stephen
stephen

so well written and with beautiful metaphors plus a subtle nod to a futuristic world. And under 1000 words, I believe. Today, the protagonist embodies a very rare personality makeup in our quite selfish world. Doubt most would give a hoot if they saw a girl in distress like Hannah.

Leximize
Leximize

A disturbing vision of our near future. Just goes to show that privacy is a right, anonymity a gift. Keep yours safe.Every time we meet someone new we have a chance and the opportunity to remake our selves.

J Mars
J Mars

This is excellent. Love the characters and the setting. My heart goes out to Hannah, and I feel like thanking the protagonist for being so kind.

Bopanna
Bopanna

Damn good...the way the futuristic-ness is subtly inserted. Beautiful heart. Loved it.

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  1. […] Check it out!  This is my first professional-level sale to actually appear in print. […]

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  3. […] really like this flash piece. It’s lovely and sweet. “Beholder” by Sarah Grey on Flash Fiction […]

  4. […] with an unshakeable passion for cheese, and, of course, a writer.  Her flash fiction piece, “Beholder,” was featured in the February 2013 issue of Flash Fiction Online.  Her most recent work has […]